...But Can Your Computer Cook Dinner?

As you may recall from my meltdown about eating at the table, I never played video games or watched TV as a child. As an adult I have discovered TV and love it, but I absolutely get tired of sitting in front of it and more often than not when "my show" is over, the TV goes off and I go about my business - whatever that may be.

Clark is the opposite.

My dear husband could play video games until his eyes rotted out of his head, and then wold insist on installing special braille keyboards, joysticks, controllers and the like, so that he could continue demolishing the online world of aliens and communists. He has logged so many hours playing video games that I think he may actually have some stock options associated with Xbox, Best Buy and possibly EA Games. When his duty station was changing he left his $2,000 gaming computer behind "because it crashed" and bought a new $1,000 one overseas which he told me was a real bargain and might need some upgrades (which is did not, has not and will not). The former works perfectly and is now residing at my parents house; the latter sits on my ottoman when not in use.

If marriage has taught me anything, it is that I should pick my battles very, very carefully. Rather than fight about the dinner table, I quietly continued to dine there and miraculously Clark now joins me (please, let's not talk about his manners...yet). Rather than complain about dishes I set a simple rule about cooking and cleaning, and it has worked. I have not tried to combat video games, quite frankly because I'm not sure I have neither the RAM nor the patience for it. God only knows what he might zip, zap or zorp me with.

Yesterday I got home after work, was exhausted, partially brain dead, starving, moody and generally a pill to be around. Clark had been home for at least two hours, yet I came home to no dinner, a dog that needed to go to the bathroom, a dark apartment of shuttered windows (ok, ok, drawn blinds... who has shutters??) and a husband lounging on the couch playing video games. Hmph. I was so irritated! Even after I fed him dinner he went back to his computer until 9:30pm, at which point I'm pretty sure he thought he would get lucky (Yeah, I went there. Get over yourself). I have hit the breaking point and I need your help! The only idea I have is to throw his computer out the window of my speeding car, but I would be concerned about other cars on the road...  I am pretty sure this is not the solution so... can you give me some pointers here? I would be really thankful... and then I'll send you an Xbox (ha. ha. ha).